Had my CT scan today - weird sensation. Being injected with this dye..could feel it surging through my body - warm but had no control over it. Really disconcerting senstation - of not being in control of something in my own body.. The actual x-ray side of things didnt bother me - but the dye left me feeling a bit out of it and toxic.
Anyway, feel like times has raced this week - gone so fast. I've not slept much, tossing and turning with unwanted dreams. Mainly of love that is no longer here physically - each day, I cut the chords, chop the ties and each night, they get re-attached in dream world. A sister thought that maybe I am working with that person on some other level..maybe?
So, off down to wonderful Devon again this weekend, to visit friends for some loving and a forage walk to discover (hopefully) some new plants and mushrooms! Back soon.
Showing posts with label plants. Show all posts
Showing posts with label plants. Show all posts
Thursday, 4 November 2010
Monday, 18 October 2010
Loving connections, Foraging Feast and re-connections...
Had an amazing weekend away..with friends 'old' and 'new'... Was wonderfully held and loved by man which enabled me to reach a depth in loving that I have not had for a while now in a physical way. I felt the clearing and release of emotion and past that had built up inside as he moved and we surrendered to the depth of loving. I left feeling more 'woman', lighter, and enlivened..
The Foraging Walk was brilliant - a few hours exploring woods by the coast with a bunch of great people and two very knowledgable and interesting leaders.. Learnt such a lot and managed to bring home some Porcelain mushrooms and Cep Mushrooms - apparently very sought after! both were delicious in my tea tonight! Will definately go down to do some more work with these guys. www.eatweeds.co.uk http://www.foragingcourses.com/
Then returning home last night, to meet up with Milo who had been taken care of by my ex..they had had a wonderful weekend together with loads of walks - wearing Milo out - which is much appreciated! Bittersweet meeting.. so wanted to not have feelings for him, but of course I do still. He treated us to some supper which was delicious and he opened up a lot - he is certainly on a journey of his own right now.. and its right that he is on his own to do it.. So much opening up, releasing of the past and letting go.. moving on in so many ways. Obviously there is sadness that I am not part of it, but really touched by how he is opening to life, trusting life more..and grateful for the part I did play in his opening to the journey.
I have to trust life too..of course She know what she is doing!
The Foraging Walk was brilliant - a few hours exploring woods by the coast with a bunch of great people and two very knowledgable and interesting leaders.. Learnt such a lot and managed to bring home some Porcelain mushrooms and Cep Mushrooms - apparently very sought after! both were delicious in my tea tonight! Will definately go down to do some more work with these guys. www.eatweeds.co.uk http://www.foragingcourses.com/
Then returning home last night, to meet up with Milo who had been taken care of by my ex..they had had a wonderful weekend together with loads of walks - wearing Milo out - which is much appreciated! Bittersweet meeting.. so wanted to not have feelings for him, but of course I do still. He treated us to some supper which was delicious and he opened up a lot - he is certainly on a journey of his own right now.. and its right that he is on his own to do it.. So much opening up, releasing of the past and letting go.. moving on in so many ways. Obviously there is sadness that I am not part of it, but really touched by how he is opening to life, trusting life more..and grateful for the part I did play in his opening to the journey.
I have to trust life too..of course She know what she is doing!
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