still journeying..much to tell... but for tonight..Buzzard energy.

I was walking with a beautiful and opening  man yesterday along a river, through some fields..when we came across this bird of prey.. which I am thinking is a buzzard.  (perhaps someone can confirm?)

it stopped us in our tracks..beautiful, sacred moment..  we both gently touched the feathers, so soft... and a recent death, no sign of injury or being got at by other animals, just a few feathers scattered around..like it had fallen or something.

anyway.. I knew this was special..the wings fell around it like angel wings...that is what I was drawn to.. but my companion was drawn to its claws....powerful and strong message...   I really wanted to take its wings, but this was not practical so we said our own thanks and walked on..

I returned to collect it on my own today..it was quite a trek and I didnt really know if it was still going to be there..or what state it was going to be in.  It did seem like I/we had missed the moment..but I couldnt stop thinking about it.  It was there!  still lovely and special...  and now gruesome as it sounds, I have its wings and claws in salt drying out...  its wings spread out are magnificent...   I have never done anything like this before but I knew that I had to do it..myself..

The message of a buzzard is a symbol of death and rebirth, new vision, new beginning and purification of the mind and body.  It asks us to be patient with ourselves and be sure of how we feel before we enter the arena of our plans...  as a buzzard is patient when it tracks its prey.  It also acknowledges you are being noticed more for what you do rather than how you look, soaring above the difficulties of life.

It teaches us to use the sense of smell and discernment, and how to glide and soar with our own energy. it foretells of imminent changes.   It also teaches confidence and the ability to stand with dignity and soar with clarity and purpose. 

It is now time for me to soar above my own perceived limitations.     It is asking whether I am ready to assert actions from my ideas!

Thank you to that beautiful man for sharing in that moment...  the message of this is also for him too...     I wonder as he was drawn to the claws in particular, whether this is about 'grasping hold', taking the plunge, to dive for what he desires...as the buzzard dives for its prey...  masculine, powerful, purposeful, strength.... X

Woods and healing

walked through the sacred woods today with Milo.. Hugged the 'mother tree' and felt her healing energy, soaking up and radiating it through my body. I sank in to the depths and could see myself standing there, holding the tree.. I could move all around, above, to the side.. all the while watching me hugging the tree.

Leaning my back against the tree, I asked for healing to my throat and for waht seemed like ages, just stood with arms raised, soaking in energy from above...in the sunlight coming through the leaves.

A new bird called in teh wood.. one that I had not heard before.. kept making me jump back into my body. I sat down facing the fallen half tree..milo lay down next to me and then just disappeared... Was aware of communing with beings, have had this before on retreat, but didnt stay with the phenomina, but danced with all beings, deities, all races..all one.

For this brief time, the sun was glorious on what is mainly a dull, grey day. warming my body, especially my throat... opening it wide, allowing the energy to travel all the way down to my yoni and then that opening wide too, allowing energy to flow from above to earth.. glorious.

On the walk back, I drank from the stream as Mother had asked me too, trusting her, and picked some peppermint to make some tea..

Malvern Hills...

I took Milo somewhere different for his walk today, we drove to the Malverns and walked over two of the peaks for several hours. It was wonderful, freeing..meeting lots of other people with their dogs, sitting watching the views and playing stick with Milo.

I didnt feel alone or in pain..just free. Had a bit of a realisation though and reminder of the meditation/journey I did the other day, where I met me as a young woman in the cave..trying to hide with her white dress on. Several times, some guys who were running past us, and whilst I controlled Milo, the lead guy would say thanks and nod.. on the second time, he said we meet again..and you know I couldnt look up, I just nodded and concentrated on Milo! Ugh!

So after giving myself a good talking to internally, the next time they passed, he said again, you see, we meet again! This time, I literally forced my head up and replied back to him..but this time, knew I hadnt smiled! So again, gave myslef another talking to and on the third occasion, tried to do the whole lot - I did for a second maybe! Now, this guy was only being friendly, nothing in it but it showed me .. God, I feel like a little girl.. that little girl that is trying desperately to fit in, blend in, not be noticed and yet she yearns to be met in the divine so deeply! She has to trust.. and be open...

Anyway, as I write that little story, it made me smile! hey.. it almost feels like I am a teenager again.. nowt wrong with that. I just need to practice!!!!

X