A while since I last wrote...largely due to just about keeping it together.. My breathing now is very bad..and was awaiting news of whether I could have a ct scan to check out my throat...but the answer was no..a bronchoscopy was the only way. all my instincts and other people with RP (relapsing polychondritis) are saying dont go there as the test can make things worse..and a ct scan is just as good.. So a visit to my own GP again who agrees with me and now I await to see what is the next step.. so frustrating.
On the one hand, this is just my body..the vehicle and in truth, 'should' not identify with the weaknesses, aches and pains etc.. but when it comes down to your actual breath...this is so hard to do. As we need to breathe every second..its not something, I can forget about really..it has an impact of every aspect of my life!
Of course, full moon, equinox, solar flares, my coming bleed all playing their part in this...all good really..but feels like I couldnt really cope with much more..feel very vulnerable. would love a cuddle!
I have some employment law bits to work on though for next week...so work hanging in there..just! Theres even potential of an office on the ground floor..or work from home with a new project... so yippee! Tomorrow I will try to get Milo out (hes been restless bless him being on so many shorter walks)...in to the woods... healing woods...
Last night the sky was amazing.. it was really calm here...beautiful skies.. but everything was eeerily quiet, the birds suddenly stopped their singing..and in the distance, you could see flashes of lightning.. but no sound or any rain..weird. Its been on the local news today, as so many people thought the same.
So..short and sweet tonight... going to get some nourishing food and bunker down....
Love..
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