More letting go.

Another day with friends in Devon, chilling out, eating, talking, playing and eating!

I had a shiatsu session to try to release a frozen shoulder/arm I’ve had for a couple of days. A deep treatment that took me through physical pain, laughter and then tears. The tears always happen when someone works on the leg that had the dvt in it..but the grief is not about that..it goes much further back to something I’ve yet to see. The shoulder didn’t release either!

Many subjects were covered again throughout the day; everything from orbs, fairies, angels, 2012, numerology, mayan stuff, egyption stuff, stone circles, serpent mounds, to dogs, people, music and of course food! It seems that we are all in a very 'new age' period of time...

In the evening, we watched a film..well two in the end. Pretty full on, one that I had to hide behind a blanket for a lot of! However, I got hooked as it was a bit of sci fi and I wanted to know what happened.. the second one a bit of a mystery film.. By the end of the two sessions, I felt drained..and just began to cry..felt really sad and in deep grief. The tears stung my cheeks.. as there was no lights on, no one could see.. and that was fine.. it felt I just needed to get it out quietly..and the whole time, I could also feel my arm/shoulder getting more relaxed.

Deep breathing, closing eyes, remembering that all is perfect...no matter how it appears or feels. The tears ended up wetting my neck and travelling down to my waist – delightful!

Our bodies are amazing really... they hold on to a trauma, emotion until we let go of it..not necessarily in the way you’d anticipate. Grief has many many layers..human emotion can run very deep..right now, it feels I’ve peeled one more layer. I feel a little sick but have a knowing that all is perfect..I just don’t yet see the bigger picture.

So, tomorrow/today, I meet up with another friend, hopefully see the beach before heading home. Must sleep now. X